You're Not Confused, You Just Need Courage.
Nothing influences us more than the world we live in—even more so the people we hold close. When we think about the work we want to be doing and the person we want to become in this world, it can cause so much confusion. Not because it’s confusing, but because we lack the courage to make a choice.
Novelist and art theorist André Malraux once said:
“Often the difference between a successful person and a failure is not one's better abilities or ideas, but the courage that one has to bet on one's ideas, to take a calculated risk—and to act.”
And it resonates with me as I believe that success isn’t determined by your capacity to be better than the next person; it comes only from your whether you bet on yourself and take action. There are and always will be someone who’s never the best at what they do, but wins, simply for their sheer ability to act.
Some people may expect differently from our choices or perhaps be uncomfortable with them, and they may voice disapproval to plague us with doubt. I’ve lived it a few times in my life, which made me feel stuck, confused, or unhappy with my life. Hell, I spent two years feeling down simply because the world got to me about how I should live my life.
It took one tiny decision to change my life, and that was to choose courage.
After finishing University, I felt like I had to commit to a regular job in what I studied. Because why else would I spend all that money? But whenever I went through the options, I could see, none of them made me happy. So I was stressed and confused about what to do. I wasn’t that confident in myself at the time, and I had no direction or clue about what was next.
Sometimes it sounds stupidly simple or evident in what we read from the world of self-improvement. But as cliche as they may be, self-improvement books truly transformed everything for me. But I doubt I would ever live the life I do, a happier life, without learning the value of courage from those people and books.
Having the courage to choose me and create a meaningful life took months of learning and practice before I felt sure of myself. But it’s one of the reasons I can feel so happy with where my life is going.
What I’ve Learned This Week
From James Clear’s 3-2-1 newsletter, I learned about why it’s better to do one (or two) things well and focus on that. He says, “People who jump from project to project are always dividing their effort, and producing high-quality work becomes difficult without intense effort. Meanwhile, your average work day can be leisurely, yet also productive, if you return to the same project each day.” Today, many people are absorbed in doing more and more in the hunt for being as busy as they can. But how can you expect to master anything when you juggle so much at once? Most times, it only leads to burnout and falling out of love with what used to make you happy.
What’s on My Mind
Putting ourselves first is what people often know but never do. Spend more time choosing what you want, spending money on what makes you happy, and being around the people and places you want to be in, even if that means you do it alone. Let you decide your life.
“The opinion of someone that can’t tell the difference between what they know and what they don’t isn’t just useless, it’s dangerous.”
— Shane Parrish
But, in any case, she does not feel she is a success. I look at her, wide-eyed, as she says this. ‘No! I haven’t succeeded at anything,’ she says. ‘I have written good, and sometimes great books. But, for me, success is not a public thing. It’s a private thing. It’s when you have fewer and fewer regrets.’
→ Toni Morrison: ‘America is going backwards’
My Favourite Thing This Week
- The first few essays are up in my second newsletter
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